'She's Out of Your League'

People are always saying it ‘what’s he doing with HER?!’, ‘She’s only after him for his money’, ‘he’s punching above his weight’. Which made me think; what are these ‘leagues’ that we have created.

Can I not date a guy who is ‘out of my league’? Do I need special permission from Cupid? Or can 2 people, no matter how similar or different, date who they want? If you are into someone, you can’t really help it, right?

xoxo

What makes him tick?

After a barrage of dates and wondering what makes blokes tick, I took to the streets (my blackberry) to find out some of my boy mates opinions. It turns out, they wouldn’t date someone who was ‘ugly’ or had a horrible name.  Salary level wasn’t really an issue, but name?!  Boys, really? I quite like my name and people normally say it’s nice so I guess I have that going for me.  When I asked if she needed to be hot or just have something about her…. They answered with the latter.

So girls, as long as you’ve got a nice name, you’re not ugly and you’ve got something to give, I guess you’re ok!

Any guys or girls for that matter want to add to this, feel free to in the comments below!

xoxo

The Potential Douche Bag....

When do you find out a bloke is a douche?

Normally when it’s too late.

I’m not a naïve person, I’m very perceptive and can normally work people out pretty quickly. It’s a talent I have. So what do you do when someone manages to bypass all that and still turn out to be a bad egg?

It’s happened to me recently. Now, forgive me for being naïve but I honestly thought this one was going somewhere. We met online, bantered messages back and forth daily for around 3 weeks, exchanged numbers and arranged a date. Our first date was on Friday 13^th, I should have known! We met for a drink, now my view was that If I was bored(it happens a lot) after a couple of drinks, I could make my excuses and run! But, it turns out… we were still drinking till 3am when we stumbled out of a club! We then continued our date(hungover) and went for lunch and to the cinema. I even picked the film… Something Borrowed. How ironic! If you don’t know what the film is about… click here. Promises of more dates, constant messages back and forth and plans for future dates galore, I actually had my fingers secretly crossed that something would become of it. Let’s face it, I’ve had my fair share of rubbish dates and figured it was about time I had a summer romance!

So, 2 months since we first started talking, we weren’t friends on facebook. This for me seemed strange at first but then it was really refreshing. Getting to know someone properly rather than from their drunken pictures and stupid comments their friends have written on their wall. But curiosity had me, so I went investigating. The saying ‘curiousity killed the cat’ is said for a reason. I was about to unearth the truth as facebook saw it.

From under 150 of his friends, I managed to find out who his ‘ex’ was, she had an open profile which said… ‘In a relationship with… ‘ and then his name listed in blue and white. Now, when I saw this I thought…. Maybe they just haven’t told the world about their break up yet. When I broke up with the guy I was living with(before the facebook days) the last people to find out was our family. Who wants to break the news to their family that their relationship is over? When the other person has become a family member themselves, its hard to come to terms with it yuourself, saying it out loud makes it… final. But then there were status updates including him ‘I can’t wait for …. To come home to the cake I have made for him’ Like seriously, are we in the 1950’s?! I thought, yeah, she’s in denial. He had always been upfront with me and said that they still lived together but were broken up and he is in the process of moving to my side of London, which he included me in, suggesting areas near to work that would be nice. So if he was upfront about it, I should be happy for the honesty from the start?

But something isn’t sitting quite right. Does that mean he had been looking for someone new before his current relationship was over? Is she in denial and can’t bear the thought of the facebook making her look like a failure? Or am I in fact being completely lied to and being strung along as the other woman. 2 women at the opposite ends of London. How likely is it that our paths will ever cross?

So, who knows. A douche bag, is a douche bag. But is he one?

xoxo

The one with the Irish charm…

If you have an Irish accent, I’m pretty much guaranteed to want to sit and listen to your voice all day. Don’t ask me why, I just like it. So when I met a little Irish charmer, I was looking forward to my date.

Being from Ireland and living and working in London for a short time so far, I chose a couple of bars for us to go for some drinks and then for food. Drinks were flowing, conversation was also flowing and we had a really good night. Apart from not being able to understand his really thick Dublin accent. Now, I like to think I’m pretty bilingual when it comes to Irish accents, but get one telling you something they are passionate about and I was nodding and trying to laugh in all the right places. We had discussed before the fact that if I was trying to keep up I would just nod and laugh and he would know to slow down and let the little London girls brain function!

So a few glasses of wine later, cocktails were next on the menu. A few of those later and we were both suitable drunk, in central London on a Wednesday night. Having a habit for missing the last train after a few drinks, I made sure I left by 10pm…which turned into 11pm and me stumbling into my friends house, doing the drunken creeping up the stairs and passing out in her bed(thanks babe!).

The night ended well, with a promise of more dates and continue of the banter… then my holiday came, then his… now nothing. The second date never came…

So my question is, where did the charm go Mr??

xoxo

Internet Dating

Fed up of rubbish choice of local men on nights out. I took advice and turned to internet dating. This isnt always for the faint hearted! There are LOTS of strange people out there. But you just need to delete the weird messages and reply to the not so weird!

There are of course, some people who seem completely normal over email, text, phone. But you meet them in real life, and sadly, they too are strange. Just when you are giving up hope, you find a normal boy, with values, who would like to take you out... and this my friends is where my inspiration for this blog came from....


xxx

Those special years...

Leaving college, I fell into working in a gym. Not your usual Fitness First, no no. A body builders gym.

You know when you see a bloke who is a body builder you think 'geez, he's big!' that happened about 100 times a day. I became immune to it. But what I didnt become immune to, was being chatted up constantly. I guess there was a lot of testosterone flying round in that place!

There were the ones who would time their workouts to when you were working, the ones who just so happened to be in the changing room when you went to lock up and the ones who would be in the free weights section there to give you a hand to put the weights away. Yeah, it was flattering.

Let me introduce M. M was a member of the gym, he was a professional in the business world, nice car, lovely flat(which i loved more than him) and of course, a good body. What can I say, I was naive!!

One day, I stole his number from the client database (which is a sackable offence, but what the hell) and text him. Then begins a lovely romance! Secret meetings away from the gym, we'd hang out. He'd take me across London on his R1 and we'd have a really good time. I spent most of that year hanging out at his house. He bought me gifts when he worked away, we shared movie nights, nights out. It was all good. Looking back I never should have called it off with him. I still think about him a lot. There was just always something that didnt sit right with me. Towards the end I was whisked off my feet... by my first love.

Oh, my first love. This is going to feel like a therapy session!! I'd had my eye on him, I'm not going to lie! He, again, went to the gym where I worked. I knew he had a girlfriend, until one day he came in and said he needed to change his address we had for him. Being polite I said 'Oh ok, have you moved house?' him- 'No, I've broken up with my girlfriend, so live on my own now' ding ding ding!! The green light!! 6 months later, we were living together, planning a holiday and in love as we knew it. I honestly thought that was it. That was the end of boyfriends, and other men. Mainly because thats the impression that we gave off. My parents spoke to us about giving them enough notice to plan a wedding, he came to family events. We were known as a pair. 3 years later we split up. End of. Over. Finito. The world as i knew it came crashing down. I had to move back home, taking our dog with me. It was devastating.

Thats when I was thrown into the world of dating.

xxx

The college years...

So, I leave school and arrive in college. To boys. Lots of boys. There are the ones taking my major in dance, there are ones taking music, drama and a whole host of other things.

There are the ones who caught wind that you were a dancer and almost immeadiately you get the 'can you do the splits' comments and questions. BORING!! Like i hadnt heard that a million times before.

No one within the college took my eye, but plenty outside did! Some have slipped from my memory, so they cant have been that good! But then there were ones who I won't ever forget.

Let me introduce J, who decided to pursue me as a summer romance. Long drives, walks in the park. It was nice, while it lasted. He was the one the girls would look at and the one who everyone wanted to be with. Nice BMW convertible (not bad for a 17 year old on daddys money!), good job, and amazing body. But with it came arrogance, at the time it was quite attractive! Now, bumping into him in bars has me in a 'what was I thinking?!' mood. He is still the same, hasn't moved on from his teenage years except he has a new car!

Then there was N. N worked in my local theatre which obviously as a dancer, I frequented a lot. He was older (about 24 at the time), had his own place he shared with work colleagues/friends and got paid! Our realtionship seems to have only lasted a matter of weeks, but in reality it was months. Times flies when you're having fun! Meals out, meals in, cinema, pub, drinks, clubs. We did everything together. We were in the same circle of friends which helped, until we broke up. To be honest, I can't remember why we did. I'm sure he'll be able to remind me. But all that was important at the time was he broke my heart. I wouldnt say I was in love. I'd say I was in love with thinking I was. But at the time it was the worst thing ever. Then there was the one fateful day where I went to me our friends in the pub, and was told that N was on his way down. Not wanting an awkward night out, my friend and I decided to leave and move on to a different pub. Thats when it happened. My heart shattered into a million pieces as I saw him walking towards us with his new girlfiend. She was tall, awful blonde bob haircut and to be honest, pretty ugly. But it wasnt over. I didnt know then, that N would make appearances throughout my 20's too.

xxx